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Leading Greats #67
Relationship Audits for Success
Ronnie Kinsey
June 30, 2024
Relationship Audits help you Flourish
Ever take the time to audit your relationships?
It's an exercise worth doing periodically - it can strengthen all aspects of your life.
Mid-year now is a fine time to consider how to reinforce your strongest relationships, and limit the less rewarding ones.
Who's genuinely adding value to your life, and who isn't?
Here's what to consider:
Who's In, Who's Out:
Relationships Evolve.
Identify those who align with your current values and goals, and gently let go of those who don't.
Who Changed:
People grow and change.
Reassess how these changes impact your dynamic.
Are they still a positive influence?
Who Benefits:
Examine who gains from your connection.
Is it a mutually beneficial relationship, or is the balance off?
Energy Drainers: Some people consistently sap your energy and optimism.
Recognize these individuals and set boundaries.
This act of setting boundaries is a powerful tool that puts you in control of your emotional well-being.
Mindset Deflaters: Be wary of those who undermine your mindset and ambitions.
Surround yourself with supporters, not detractors.
Their positive influence will uplift and motivate you on your journey.
Swollen Egos: Identify individuals with inflated egos who dominate conversations and diminish others' contributions.
It's important to maintain a healthy distance from such individuals to ensure you feel respected and valued.
Lost Drive: Consider those who've lost their spark.
While compassion is crucial, so is your progress.
Support where you can, but keep their inertia from becoming yours.
By auditing your relationships, you not only prioritize your well-being but also refine your connections for optimal growth.
Speak up for yourself, even when it's uncomfortable.
Address imbalances candidly, regardless of the other person's rank.
It's about ensuring your environment supports your best self.
Relationship Audit Grading Scale
Here is a Audit tool to consider:
Score each relationship on the following criteria from 1 to 5
(1 being the lowest, 5 the highest):
Mutual Benefit
1: No mutual benefit; one-sided
2: Minimal benefit, mostly one-sided
3: Some mutual benefit, somewhat balanced
4: Good mutual benefit, generally balanced
5: Excellent mutual benefit, highly balanced
Emotional Support
1: Consistently drains emotional energy
2: Occasionally drains emotional energy
3: Neutral, neither supports nor drains
4: Generally supportive
5: Highly supportive, uplifting
Alignment with Values and Goals
1: Completely misaligned
2: Mostly misaligned
3: Somewhat aligned
4: Generally aligned
5: Perfectly aligned
Growth and Development
1: Stagnant or regressive influence
2: Little to no growth influence
3: Neutral, no impact on growth
4: Encourages some growth
5: Strongly encourages growth and development
Reciprocity and Effort
1: No effort or reciprocity
2: Minimal effort or reciprocity
3: Some effort and reciprocity
4: Generally reciprocal, balanced effort
5: Highly reciprocal, strong effort from both sides
Total Scoring
A ] 21-25: Ideal Relationship
Strongly supportive, mutually beneficial, and aligned.
These are your key relationships to nurture.
B ] 16-20: Positive Relationship
Generally supportive and beneficial but may need minor adjustments or more precise boundaries.
C ] 11-15: Neutral Relationship
Neither strongly positive nor negative.
Reassess the value and consider adjustments or setting boundaries.
D ] 6-10: Challenging Relationship
It can be more draining than beneficial.
Consider whether the effort to maintain this relationship is worthwhile or if it's time to move on.
E ] 1-5: Toxic Relationship
Strongly negative impact on your well-being.
Prioritize your health and consider ending or significantly distancing yourself from this relationship.
Making Room for New Bonds
Reach Out Today
Identify Potential Connections: Think of someone you've been eager to connect with, whether it's a colleague, a friend of a friend, or someone you admire professionally.
Craft a Thoughtful Message: Personalize your outreach. Mention why you're interested in connecting and how you think it could be mutually beneficial.
Be Genuine: Authenticity resonates. Share a bit about yourself and why you're excited about this potential connection.
Set Deadlines for New Bonds
Create a Connection Plan: Write down a list of 5-10 people you'd like to connect with in the coming weeks.
Set Clear Deadlines: Assign a deadline for each outreach. For instance, aim to connect with at least one new person each week.
Example: "By [Date], I will have contacted [Name] for a call/meeting."
Follow-up: If you don't get a response, follow up politely after a week. Persistence shows your genuine interest.
Giving Your Best Version
Be Present: When you do connect, be fully present. Listen actively and engage in meaningful conversation.
Show Appreciation: Express gratitude for their time and insights. It leaves a positive impression and opens the door for future interactions.
Offer Value: Think about what you can offer them in return.
Connecting is a two-way street.
Achieve Your Greatest Dreams of Success
By making room for fresh, supportive bonds and actively seeking meaningful connections, you're positioning yourself to reach your most fantastic dreams of success.
These new relationships will not only provide you with fresh perspectives and opportunities but also reinforce your journey toward the success you truly deserve.
Remember, every connection is a step towards a more prosperous, more fulfilling personal and professional life.
Start today, set those deadlines, and watch your network and success flourish together.
Resources => on Meaningful Relationships:
Book: "The 5 Love Languages" by Gary Chapman
In the context of good relationships, love is a verb. It is active.
Love is something you do, not something you feel.
Good relationships are based on doing and giving.
Why: Although primarily about personal relationships, this book offers insights into how understanding and fulfilling each other’s needs can strengthen any relationship.
TED Talk: "How to Build a Company Where the Best Ideas Win" by Ray Dalio
Meaningful work and meaningful relationships aren’t just nice things we choose to do if we have the time—they are vital, and they drive success.
Why: Ray Dalio discusses the principles that helped him build a successful company, emphasizing the critical role of strong, supportive relationships in fostering innovation and success.
HOW I can HELP YOU:
1.]
^ As a Leadership Catalyst and Executive Coach, I empower Executives, Leaders, and Professionals to Fortify Relationships for Success in Life and Career.
^ As a Conscious Leader, I help you Master Real Performance and Well-being.
^ If this sounds like you, your organization, or someone you know - I can help.
**See CONTACT Links a few lines down.
2.]
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- For those leaders and professionals interested in leading greatly at all levels of life, work, and relationships, you can start now.
Reach out, and let’s get a strategy call on the calendar so you can get closer to what you really want in life, work, and relationships at ronniekinsey.net
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Til next time - Keep it Great,
-Ronnie
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